the road back to profitability

I have a suggestion as to how the news media can make up some of the
lost revenue they've been missing... profit by extortion.

Here's how it works... "Give us $5 or we'll continue to write stories
about the current marital status updates of Jon + Kate + 8."

Hell, I'd pay.

kodachrome, gives us those nice bright colors...

For no discernible reason, I was just thinking back to the days of Q-Zar (laser tag) and to Whirlyball parties.   The only reason I can possibly come up with is that I was thinking of Tallahassee Mall, which had a huge laser tag arcade thing there when I was a Freshman, and it closed before maybe end of sophomore year.

I wonder if those things were as much damned fun as I remember them being, or if it's just one of those things that seemed awesome because I was 12, or if they really were cool.

I remember when I was a little kid I was at the pre-school at Miami-Dade Community College, and taking the loooooong walk over to the auditorium building were these huge hills we would roll down whenever we got the chance.   I was there a couple of years ago to take a grad school entrance exam, and I see it's the next building over, and someone went and shrunk the hills.  

Must be global warming.

there we were waving Brenda Renetti goodbye

Random thought.   You know the Billy Joel song Scenes from an Italian Restaurant?   It's the one with the middle part that is generally referred to as "The Ballad of Brenda and Eddie."

 

The thing is for the longest time (oh ohhh ohhh for the longest time), I thought it was a song about someone named Brenda Renetti.  Admittedly, a lot of the lyrics don't make sense if it's not about two people ("We always thought they would both find a way to survive" certainly gets odd).   But then, it wouldn't be the first time a song had confusing lines.   I'm still trying to figure out what Billy Joe McAllister threw off the Tallahatchee Bridge.

I don't know why it bothers me...

Bothers is the wrong word, but still... I'd just as soon not get so many notes suggesting all the neat little things I could get for my dad for Father's Day.

I find myself pretty relieved when it's come and gone.

I won!

So, today is, ummm, the 2nd week of the rest of my life.

Who would have guessed it, I'm for the first time Mister... okay well actually that part doesn't change, but TLMS is now also Mrs. Spartan :)

I think I'm officially out of excuses. It's been two weeks since the wedding and one week since we got back from the honeymoon. She says I have to get some stuff won into the blog before I forget it, and she's got a good sense about these sorts of things.

So, hmmm... I was trying to remember random thoughts to jot down when going through the weekend. Here they are in something vaguely resembling chronological order.

* Having all the guys back together again is a good thing. Having all the guys in town together was neat. Having all the guys in my car at the same time with their luggage was more than a little funny. We piled outta that thing like a frigging clown car. Josh sitting on Torsky's lap --- I wish I'd gotten some pictures.

* I knew somehow I was going to get stuck with a few extra Marlins tickets and shelling out more than $100 of my own money. I really tried to get around it. But I don't really know what else I can do when people tell me on Wednesday night they're bringing someone to the game, and Friday neither of them come, well... guess who gets left holding the debt. Least I got a shirt and a hat out of the deal ;-)

* After the game... ummm... the poetry reading sure was interesting.

* The rehearsal reminded me of Usual Suspects. A line of guys chuckling and barely following orders :)

*Somehow though I had months of warning, there was still stuff I had to do ON the way to the rehearsal to be prepared. As it turns out, the rehearsal really helped because it gave me pretty specific directions to focus on during El Dia Grande, and answered pretty much any of my questions.

* The rehearsal dinner was nice, and I think everyone there enjoyed it... despite the restaurant not putting us in the room we'd booked for. However, the free round of champagne for the entire party certainly helped dull the pain. The groomsmen table might argue that the dozen or 15 bottles of wine helped dull some pain a bit too.

* I'm not entirely sure why I was disconnecting so much that day. I think it's a combination of the lingering effects of the... errr..."food poisoning". I think it was also a bit of nerves.

* I'd been told by a couple of the bridesmaids how amazing the dress was going to look, how beautiful Sarah was going to be, etc. Of course, my natural guy reaction was "okay, I'd better figure out how to act like it's a big deal." When I saw her in the back of the church, I could only think (and believe I said) "Wow."

That's all you get for now... more on the trip next time. I only wanna say I consider myself a lucky and contented fella. If you're reading this and were part of the big day, I'd appreciate it if you could share a thought or two :)

got a lot done yesterday... tick, tick, tick...

Yesterday was pretty productive, for a Sunday.   TLMS and I were able to check a few things off the list.   I picked up the certificate of completion from the church (whew!  we gradiyated!), we sat with the DJ for about 45 mins and discussed a lot about the music... ugh @ driving to Homestead and back... TLMS was muy happy for having found the perfect canvas bags at Old Navy to fill with stuff for the bridesmaids and guests.... we got the sheets to create little "Bradley and Sarah trivia cards" that we can scatter around the tables with the US history cards.   I also wrote up some of the little facts we can populate those cards with.  Having selected the songs, I even got a mini-dance lessons from Sarah (I think I only stepped on her toes mebbe 2 or 3 times).

Also got the last hotel booked for the big trip.  Found a lovely hotel in Munich with a panorama view in the top floor.  Now if only I could find out why even the bigger rooms have double beds instead of kings.   Doh!

Hope to get a bit more training betwixt now and el dia grande.

Chilling on South Beach now, killing time in a pizza joint and waiting for my mom to land so I can go get her at el aeropuerto.  Speaking of airports... this time, in two weeks, we'll be on a plane on the way across the Atlantic :)

more random thoughts

ya know, I don't talk much about work here, but...

Just once I'd like to have a pitch for a client go something like this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZY2mRG5mzg

"It is I, his Chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga.   Let me tell you of the days of high adventure..."

are you a sell-out if you're not being paid? ;-)

Well, faithful reader(s), looks like I'm going to start contributing occasionally to a local political Web site... www.sflaconservative.com.   Run by a pretty good guy who's come to work with the Biscayne Bay Young Republicans some, Marcos Sendon... a regular guy who basically just realized there are some pretty cool ways out there today to communicate with like-minded people.

So, if you're reading this... maybe check that page too from time to time.   It'll doubtless be a bit more serious than this (tho that ain't exactly a high bar to clear)

under construction

I don't think I can describe the state the house is in... the entire first floor is basically gutted.   No more working TV, just the little one in Mom's room.   Guess I'll be doing a lot of Netfliking and such, when not down at TLMS's of course.   Still, it's only a couple of weeks.   Then.... first day of the rest of my life ;-)

update

Pretty neat new feature, I can now e-mail posts and have them come up directly to my blog.   This is (a little) easier than logging onto my blog and doing it that way, so hopefully that means updates more often :)

My blogging and Facebookery was apparently one of the questions at TLMS's bridal shower.   I wonder if that means anyone will stumble across this blog.   Hellooooo ladies!

Speaking of TLMS, we're inside of a month now.   Oof!   Always get a weird feeling when I've been looking forward to something for a long time, and then suddenly it's behind ya.   Course, in this case, it's just a beginning...

tea party

Was told to expect maybe 500 for the Miami Tea Party. Supposedly police reports were closer to 3,000. Makes sense because there was a lot coming and going throughout the day. Peaceful, upbeat, some chuckle-worthy signs... TLMS's we came up with simply said "SOCIALISM SUCKS."

Going to reconvene on the 19th downtown... should be interesting....

the glasses thing

Weird story with the glasses, thought I'd share (though my most regular readers I think have already heard by now). These things seem to only happen to me, but I guess it's not actually ALL that rare.

So, about a month ago I lost my glasses. Things had been in a lot of turmoil (still settling in from the move, house is all torn up, whatever... bottom line is I looked for a while but they didn't seem to want to turn up. For all I know they could be in my car. But I could have a pregnant wombat in my car and I probably wouldn't know apart from a slight change in the smell.

Anyway, at the merry discount price of about $125 I had to finally give in and buy a new pair of glasses. Even at the super "hey let's advertise our swell discounts, bargainbargainbargain!!!" stores, they still wallet-rape me, because I have the audacity to have one eye stronger than the other.

So, anyway, I had a new pair for the course of a WEEK... and somehow lost those too. It was pretty frustrating because with the house being in the state it is (what with there being basically NOTHING on the first floor), there honestly weren't that many places they could be.

I finally figured it out... I had taken them off when checking my mom's oil. I got distracted when I was doing it because her car was apparently built as, like, a Special Olympics fundraiser or something because the dipstick goes at a complete right angle. Well anyway apparently what I did was I put the glasses under the hood along the side of the engine, didn't realize I left them there, slammed the hood and walked away.

Of course, between the time I did this and realizing where I'd likely left them, Mom had since driven the car a couple of times. I figured what would most likely happen was I'd go out and find them absolutely shattered... MAYBE I'd be able to save the frames and just get new lenses.

Popped the hood, went out... 100$ fine. not even dirty. Whew! Lucky.

And hey I can see now too, so I've got that going for me.

the MacGuffin

Sandra stepped off the plane and walked through the airport rubbing the back of her neck. Her lack of ease and discomfort was not strictly because of the cramped seat next to the impossibly fat man on the cross-country flight. She was nervous because she was to serve as the courier of the MacGuffin Diamond.

If the rumors she'd heard were true, the MacGuffin was easily worth more than her life was. The strange man chasing her in Cleveland certainly seemed to think so --- he seemed to be operating under the idea that getting her out of the way would have just made things easier. It was only because of the timely intervention of some local law enforcement that she was even afforded this opportunity to be uncomfortable. She'd be glad when she had the nine million dollars instead, then she would just be targets of your average everyday scum instead of the best of the worst.

She had grown tired from the continued effort that goes into always trying to examine every little bit of the periphery, suspecting every seemingly random movement as being the start of another attack. She instead indulged herself with a little daydreaming of how life would be different when she had the money instead of the burden. It was perhaps because of this distraction that she didn't see the round gentleman in the sheriff's uniform come up to her. She spun around so fast her shoulder-length dark hair actually trailed her twirling head when he tapped her on the wrist.

"Wha---- what?" she half-asked.

"Sorry, ma'am. You're Miss Desmond?" She quickly scanned the stocky, reasonably good-natured man in blues that were perhaps a half-sized too small. His skin was a bit paler than hers. She saw from his look that he didn't really need her confirmation to know it was indeed her, and she managed only a slight nod of affirmation.

"I'm Kirk Hamill. Oh..." he paused and flashed a badge to put her at ease. "I'm supposed to be at your disposal to ensure you don't run into any problems. I'd suggest being careful. You never know who you can trust in a situation like yours."

She breathed a sigh of relief. "Preaching to the choir, Kirk. Preaching to the choir. It was only because of some of the good work of guys like you that I've made it this far. To tell you the truth I wonder if it's even worth all this... having to always keep on my guard."

"Well, you're in my town, now" he said with a toothy grin, "and we may get you to sit back and enjoy a Red Apple beer like a regular local."

She nodded, and he went on ahead to where a car was waiting to take her to the hotel. "Sheriff..." she called after him. He didn't turn around, the airport was bustling and noisy. "SHERIFF..." she repeated, then with a chuckle she shouted quite deliberately "HEY! HAMMILL!" He turned around with the same toothy grin. "As long as you're providing hospitality and protection, would you mind helping me with one of these bags?" He grabbed her dufflebag and picked it up with surprising ease as they trudged along to his unmarked police car.

As they drove in from the airport, he went into standard narration. All this here used to be nothing but fields, he reported with wide sweeping gestures. A couple of new companies had built serene offices on the outskirts, and the town just grew like Topsy. He expressed a certain disdain for people whose work was just pushing numbers and ideas around, and longed for people who did a good honest day's labor like him. Somewhere in the midst of his extolling the virtues of a man you could trust by looking in his eyes, she actually chuckled. He was pleased to see she seemed to be letting her hair down a bit.

As they pulled up to the hotel, he grabbed her dufflebag again. "That's not... ya know, 'it', is it?" he asked. "Hmm? No. That's just my clothes and a hairdryer, and something for my nephew, a Cleveland Indians jersey." She decided that was enough sharing, though she subconsciously clutched her handbag a bit tighter. He nodded and carried her dufflebag into the hotel ahead of her.

Retrieving her key from the front desk, she turned to see Kirk chatting up the presumably college-aged girl behind the concierge desk. "Red Apple beer, huh?" He nodded. "I haven't had a minute to relax or a real conversation since this mess all began. Hang on a sec and I'll be right back down. That is if you're off-duty." He smiled. She dashed up to 212, slipped into a pair of tight jeans and a low-cut top, and came back down, still clutching her purse with the MacGuffin Diamond safely wrapped inside. Kirk was waiting in the bar. He had ordered her a beer and looked to be halfway through one of his own.

Sandra laughed and rolled through a few of her favorite almost-true stories. He told her about "his first ex-wife", which meant it stood to reason there were at least two loved and lost. She chuckled thoroughly for the first time since this whole ordeal began. One beer had become 4 and was on its way to a fifth when he leaned in.

"Why don't you let me take that to the hotel safe," he pleaded with her. "I hate to see you stressing like that. The hotel clerk is my second ex-wife's brother," he said with a chuckle. "Wish I coulda married him instead!"

She handed him the handbag, surprisingly heavy given the weight of the MacGuffin. He walked off, singing aloud the song they'd both just discovered they remembered. She waited and sipped her beer.

The bar over the TV had been showing some local basketball, which ended, and was now on the local news. She glanced up only in passing, her eyes a bit out of focus, to read who was being interviewed, a middle-aged, thin, black woman in the full dress blues of a police officer. The chiron flashed up below her, 'SHERIFF LUCILLE JOHNSON'.

She paused. "Hey, uhh, bartender? Who's that up there?"

"Oh, that? Sheriff Lucille? You must be from out of town. We're the largest city in America with a black female sheriff. She does a dang good job around here too, that's why she's been re-elected five times."

"Then... who was that I was just in here with?"

"Don't follow. You're asking ME who YOU were in the bar with?" said the bartender, head tilted like a cocker spaniel.

"That wasn't the sheriff?"

"Now, I KNOW you ain't had that many. There's a bit of a difference, if you catch my meaning."

"Then who was he? Shit."

She dashed out into the lobby to see a few people milling around, the young girl at the counter... but no Kirk. He was gone, and the diamond and the big-bellied man were nowhere to be found. She walked up to the desk, and asked if anyone had left something in the hotel safe.

"The what now?"

"The hotel safe."

"We don't have a safe."

"I'm guessing you don't have a sister's ex-husband either?"

"I also don't have a Jaguar. What are you getting at?"

"Ah hell."

do you know helen green? Because you look like helen green.

I've heard that when you're in polite company, it's not nice to bring up the subjects of sex, religion, or politics in discussion.

I heard that from this nun while she was nailing Joe Biden.

multiculturalism in the space program

So, I just heard an interesting song by the Police, apparently it's about the role Hispanics from the neighborhood will play someday in interstellar travel...

Joaquin, back from your house, Joaquin on the moon...

My impression of....

behind the scenes at the White House...

Apparently there was a camera onsite when Obama asked Biden to be his runningmate. Biden's reaction is kind of a surprise, apparently he felt he should be the head of the ticket, even though he could never quite get over that public perception problem...





Or, for those of us jonesing for the whole scene...

even randomer thought...

So, apparently there's a movie coming out where Nicolas Cage gets a list of where all the disasters and bombs are going to go off and has to try and stop them.

To which, I have to say... if that's the case, why did he still make Bangkok Dangerous anyway?

random thought....

someday, I'd like to have tricked somebody... to the point where once they realize my having gotten the better of them, they are compelled to drop to both knees, shake both fists in the air and just shout "GERBEEEEEEEEER!!!!!!!!" at the top of their lungs in an empty room.

the move thing

I was thinking of sharing some thoughts and updates on "the little move before the big move", and disproving the notion that you can't go home again. But I figure most everyone who would read this know about it.

So, if you have any interest in hearing about the move (i.e. weren't PART of it), let me know.

My impression of...

Obama apologizing to the media for having four of his top appointment nominees revealed to have serious legal issues.

Obama [with puppy eyes]: "Gee, I'm so sorry guys. This was all my bad, for real."

Media pool: "Yeah, well... OHHHH you, come here... I just stay mad at you. Who's a good boy? Yes you are!"

snow? you bastard!

I openly admit to stealing this from a stand-up routine I heard once, but hey I thought it was funny enough to share...

When watching local news, I hate that awkward toss over to the weather guy, when the anchor always has that conceited mock-upset tone in blaming the weatherman for a bad day, as if it's his fault. "Rain again? THANKS Bob."

It's not as if the weather guy's going to throw it back and say "Three more murders? WAY TO GO, Steve."

random thoughts from the weekend of Richard and Jenny

This is the first time in a while I've put something up here without thinking it through in advance, so excuse a little stream of consciousness.

Some observations from the weekend, in no particular order and perhaps of no particular relevance to anyone who wasn't present.

* I don't care if NO ONE else thinks it's funny... I'm still going to call it "Our Lady of the Orange and Green."

* Any bar where four people can sit making balloon animals and not get a single sideways look probably has earned its nickname as "The Star Wars Bar." (or, for the good and nerdy among us, The Mos Eisley Cantina)

* Everything was very nice, and I'm very happy for them, and I look forward to hanging together... but at the same time I'll also be happy if this doesn't mean the end of the occasional cigar night.

* Was actually surprised that I enjoyed heading out for Indian. And third wheeling it at that. But hey, it got me out and with good peeps.

* If that's being "single", then I'm a vermicious knid.

* I don't pretend to know a lot about this stuff... but offhand I'd guess it's a good thing that the first question from everyone is where she is. it's a great thing that no matter where it is I wish she was there :)

* I'm drained. And I didn't even have anything official to do. THEY must be zombies by this point.

* Guess I saw both my future and my past today... in that order, and within a few hours of each other. Interesting experience.

* I'd like to thank Lisa's sister for welts, a sudden taste for veal, and an invisibility cloak.

* At least there wasn't a chicken dance. But... mariachis? That's different.

* Kinda interesting experience, and maybe a sign of the times, that I saw this one from "Jennie is going to move back to Miami and will probably start dating Richard." to this. A few years in between!


* I think it's funny that the guy who gave the worst gift ever ever in the history of ever (well, maybe second worst gift, to "WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!?")... I think it's funny he's still trying to justify it as NOT having been an idiotic move.

top 5 resons Dark Knight sucked.

Everyone's all giddy about Dark Knight, the most recent Batman movie. And it's only going to come up more now that it's "award season".

So, here's the 5 biggest problems I have with the movie.

5. What the hell is Scarecrow doing in this movie? He seems to be thrown in so randomly. It was a well-written and interesting character in the first one, and now he's thrown in in a way that only seems like the second scene with the first one explaining it somehow on the cutting room floor. It's basically "How do we give a wink and a nod to people who liked the first one? Well Scarecrow's still alive, let's throw him in a parking lot small-batch drug deal that Batman busts up. I'm sure no one will wonder what he's doing there, or why Batman is interested in this one small nickel-and-dime deal then goes back to fighting roving painted lunatics."

I mean, for all the sense of having him in the scene, he might as well have gotten out of the van and said "It's the Scarecrow. With my friends Huckleberry Finn, Don Quixote and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Now, do you want this dimebag?"

4. All that running around must make him breathless. Enough already with Bruce Wayne / Batman heavy breathing. Is he a superhero or a phone sex operator?

3. Joker's motivations (or lack thereof). I guess having a villain who isn't doing it for any REASON... someone who's just flat-out maniacal, is a little different. Though as an audience member you still feel a bit cheated by not having a rationale. But you can't really simultaneously be calculating but without a purpose, mad but organized, interested only in chaos yet trying to protect yourself... In Silence of the Lambs, you don't see Buffalo Bill being concerned with how he's going to make his house payments, it just makes for a more confusing character, not a deeper one. And hell even he had reasons, even if they were carnal. Hell, Nicholson's Joker was maniacal, but if you're gonna be insane you should be at least a little sloppy.

2. Maggie Gyllenhaal just seems bored. She acts the same around her life long love as she does Commissioner Gordon as she does the Joker. She seems disinterested and devoid of emotion. Great movie heroines, you can tell what their thoughts and hopes and emotions are even if you had the sound off. Here, you can't even tell what she wants. Ingrid Bergman could have single-handedly ruined Casablanca if she'd been this blank throughout.

1. The end of Batman Begins

Ra's al Ghul: Have you finally learned to do what is necessary?
Bruce Wayne: I won't kill you, but I don't have to save you.

How are you going to have Dark Knight be about whether Batman's willing to off a baddie if he's already made that decision in the first one?

polimpressionism

My impression of...

the average media member. Picture a late 30s newspaper editor in his pjs and socks on a bed with Hannah Montana posters on the wall.

"Did you see Obama on the cover of this month's Esquire OH MY GOD he is so dreamy. His eyes look really, like, thoughtful, ya know? I'm serious! I bet he likes ponies. I like ponies.

We should TOTALLY do a story on him. No, like, another one. So people can see how awesome he is."

but my couscous!!!

Here's a treat for anyone who stumbles across this and is around my age...



"The Boys / Girls of Rock n' Roll" scene from the Chipmunk Movie or whatever it was called. Not that weird-ass thing that came out a year or so ago with My Name is Earl, this is the late 80s cartoon movie where they go around the world, and there was, like, someone smuggling diamonds in toys or something. Anyway, I always thought this song and this scene were fun.

Man, that Chipette was a tease.

I'm gonna ask TLMS if, when we go around Europe, if I can dance on the side of a hot air balloon. I'm sure that's all sortsa safe.


Interesting point for comparison... God bless YouTube, I guess... someone with more spare time and the right equipment apparently posted what the "original voices" would have sounded like.




And to truly prove the utility of the Internet... someone apparently did one set to scenes of Harry Potter because... ummm okay so I don't actually know why.

Convening the court of Man Law

Two cases to be considered... one involving me and one I witnessed. Looking for Man Law rulings...

For the first one.... I don't know these people's names, I'm just gonna pick random names so I don't have to keep saying "first guy" and "second guy", etc.

[i]Good Faith Effort?[/i]

Scene is a football game... Josephus and Mortimer are squeezing by to get out past the end of the row. Pancho isn't in his seat but he left a nearly full beer there, Mortimer accidentally knocks it over. He promises Pancho's friends he'll replace it.

While J&M are gone, it turns out Pancho and his friends are "mistakenly" in the wrong seats, and the real owners come back. Josephus and Mortimer come back WITH an extra compensation beer for Pancho, who of course now is nowhere to be found. After holding it for a couple of minutes they decide to give the extra beer away to their buddy Alouicious.

Pancho comes back about 20-30 minutes later and demands his beer. They say they brought one for him but he was nowhere to be found. He wants $12 compensation, though J&M insist a beer is only $8. He eventually gets frustrated and leaves.


So.... Josephus and Mortimer did their Man Law job? When they spilled the beer they made a "good faith effort" to replace it and kept it for a reasonable time? Or when you knock over a beer are you 100% OBLIGED to replace it?



Case 2: Mitigating circumstances...

Okay so I did something I've never done before. I left a football game early. A bowl game at that! Butbutbutbutbut...

consider:
1. They were free tickets, a gift.
2. Wasn't sitting with a group, just with TLMS.
3. I didn't have any particular rooting interest for either team.
4. It was fairly cold and windy (well, cold and windy by Miami standards). And TLMS gets cold way before I do, and I thought it was cold, so that tells ya something.
5. We stayed till it was, barring some really record-breaking miracles, no longer in doubt.
6. The seats were at an odd angle. We were in the corner of one end zone and only a few rows up from the field. Which is great, unless you're trying to figure out what's going on on the far side of the field.
7. It was after midnight, and TLMS lives maybe 30-35 miles from the stadium, and then I have to come back halfway again from there to my own place. And I had to work the next day.

I want you to stop saying the filthflarn, filthflarn, filth.

If you haven't seen this... a) where have you been anyway, and b) it's pretty dang funny. It's Eddie Murphy doing a Bill Cosby impression as part of his 80s standup routine.

I especially like this because given some of the things Bill Cosby has said, politically, since then... I imagine the conversation was actually really pretty close to this.


Incidentally, this ain't even a little bit "office appropriate".

Not till we plan our Martin Luther King Day celebrations

I think, with 30 and Chismis and New Years now all being behind us, we're officially on the clock like the Detroit Lions. Sunday, May 17. Still in shock, mostly, I think...

I'm wondering...

If 30 minutes (thanks Sarah!) on the Wii Fit (thanks Mom!) deserves a cigar (thanks Hilary!) and a glass of scotch (thanks Steve!) out by the water (ummm thanks me) with a good book (thanks Sarah's folks) :)

random thoughts from running errands...

* I am, apparently and not much of a surprise, "the kind of guy who goes into a Whole Foods, but only to buy beer and turn around and leave."

* I was going to think about giving up on my wash and fold place, they raised their prices and it was expensive even before that. Although... I walked in and they had two laundry bags hanging on the wall for sale --- one GARNET and one GOLD. I think I'll stick with them a while :)

* Regardless of your particular politics, I think you'd have to admit... someone saying Caroline Kennedy Schlossburg, because of having no previous experience and only a famous name, faces an uphill battle for the senate seat of Senator Hillary CLINTON... ummmm...

* There's no one around but me. But regardless, I'm hoping I smell "musky". Ya know, as opposed to "like I just spilled a half a cup of coffee on my shirt".

* Vacation vault? Really?

* I went down an alley, and got stuck behind a Chinese guy loading up BUCKETS of soy sauce into the back of a pickup truck behind a restaurant. And all I could think of was... man what I wouldn't give for 200 or so steamed dumplings.

* I get the Odessa part, because we were talking about a player being from Odessa, FL when watching the game. Where I got writing a term paper on the movie Jaws I have no idea.

* I think people that make a big deal about Wal-Mart or LL Bean or whoever NOT wishing them a Merry Christmas, saying happy holidays instead, are kinda missing the point. I mean, MY definition of Christmas has nothing to do with 10% off of anything... and it certainly doesn't include elves or retail (except perhaps for a couple of guys picking up myrrh at the local myrrhateria). So if Santa becomes part of the secular HAPPY HOLIDAYS, and Christmas goes back to being the realm of Christmas celebraters... well that ain't necessarily all bad.